Dear Diary

by Dib Mossavi

I preferred staying within the safety of my “hard outer shells”, the protective walls of my home and the coziness of my familiar relationships with peers and colleagues alike.  I learnt to be more expressive in demonstrating my feelings.

Sometimes I realized I may be overly concerned about what friends are thinking of me. Its like as if I’m being rejected. …or perhaps it’s only my heightened sensitivity and not anyone else’s negative judgment …… the good news is, that sensitivity actually motivated my self-protective actions.  I’ll try to be more open to others even if I felt terribly vulnerable.

Why do I still expect others to be straightforward and share their needs with me while I’m struggling to be upfront about what I want? …..Dib! No double standard pls or you will land in trouble!! …. especially if people aren’t willing to compromise. Hmmm …. but sometimes we want save a situation from getting worse …… on 2nd thoughts, no lah, I’d better save my hard bargaining and poker face  another time …. today I wanna  simply place my cards face up on the table!!!!

 

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